“Do not insert swab into ear canal.”

That was not written by a moron, it was written by a lawyer. Not to be repeating myself, just sayin’.

As a hearing-impaired person who visits an audiologist at least once a year … which person’s first move is to examine my ear canal for wax, I can tell you that the q-tip method works fine. The times the audiologist has said, “Oops, we’ve got some wax in there,” are zero. Nada. Never happened.

Here’s what you need to know to use a q-tip effectively for cleaning out your ear wax: forget about the canal, concentrate on the entryway. That’s where the wax builds up, so if you roll the q-tip around there, you’ll get the job done fine.

Having said that, if you jam the q-tip in and puncture your eardrum, you yourself are a moron, and the author accepts no responsibility for any ill effects experienced therefrom.